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The Pursuit of Happiness

The pursuit of happiness is one of the primary goals of all humans. This, along with life and liberty, was declared as an essential right in the US declaration of independence. Every religion and philosophy has offered its pathway to happiness. Happiness is a state of mind and there are many paths to it. There are common prerequisites to sustained happiness as well as common causes of unhappiness. These usually transcend all classifications of gender, age or race. There are other factors which are very individual specific.

Happiness is a state of the mind. The dictionary definition is 'feelings of joy and pleasure mingled together". A feeling of happiness is more than just an experience of joy or pleasure. It is a state of mind where the individual feels that "life is good".

Becoming Happier

The Pursuit of Happiness

Happiness is a state of mind which can be induced by many means - some result in short term happiness while others result in long lasting happiness. One way of inducing long lasting happiness and bliss is meditation. For a busy person, a more practical way to becoming happier is to make steady progress towards meaningful goals. Even though this seems simple, it really is a very powerful technique to attain a state of long lasting happiness. The goals may vary from individual to individual, but for everyone happiness comes from merely making steady progress towards goals that are meaningful to them. The key is that goals have to be meaningful to you. Progress towards goals set by some one else will not bring happiness (unless you too desire the same goals).

There should be a balance in your goals to ensure that the prerequisites of happiness are fulfilled. These prerequisites include good health, sufficient income to meet basic needs, affection, some productive work or activity, defined and achievable goals and good attitude. All the money in the world will not make you happy if you ignore your health or have bad relationships. Also you must try to remove the causes of unhappiness from your life. These causes are - lack of any of the prerequisites for happiness, failure to achieve goals, envy, relationship problems, loneliness and fear of the opinion of others.

Studies have shown that a number of factors contribute to sustained happiness. Some of these are
o Good self esteem

o Feeling of control over one's life

o Supportive and warm relationships (marriage/friendship )

o Satisfying work

o Enjoyable leisure activities

o Good attitude

o Good Health

o Moderation in everything

o Impersonal interests

Thus a very effective process of becoming happier is to set goals for improvement in each one of these areas, start working towards these goals and then periodically reviewing the progress towards the goals.

So the first step is to set goals for yourself in the major aspects of your life. These goals have to be meaningful to you and they have to be specific and time bound. If the goals are not meaningful to you, you will derive little happiness from achieving them. Also if they are not specific and time bound, you will not be able to measure your progress towards these goals and thus will not experience the increased happiness which comes from making steady progress towards your goals. Goals need to be set for the major aspects of your life which contribute to happiness - Health, Financial, Relationships, Career, Attitude, Self Actualization etc.

Then you must assess where you currently are in relation to your goals. Say if your financial goal is to have savings of twenty thousand dollars in five years, you need to assess your net worth today and also your current income and expenses to know how much you are currently saving.

Next you must set up a time bound action plan to achieve your goals. For your financial goals this means determining the extra amount you need to save each month, either by earning more or spending less or both. Then you need to have a plan for earning more and for reducing your expenses. This plan needs to be specific with amounts and timing e.g. you will reduce expenses by a month by eating out less often and you will increase income by 0 a month by taking on a part time job.

Then start implementing your plan and monitor the progress. As you see yourself meeting your periodic targets, you will find your happiness increasing. Many of us have experienced the happiness which comes from steadily losing one pound per week in a weight loss program. Imagine having the same effect in all aspects of your life. The important thing in this is to make steady progress towards your goals. Happiness will grow as you see yourself making progress. Once you achieve your initial goals, you need to set new goals - maybe in different areas of your life e.g. if you have achieved your fitness and financial goals, aim for making a difference to the world around you. (Making a difference is a source of deep and long lasting happiness). Being without a goal after achieving your earlier ones will reduce your happiness. Say you suddenly inherit some money and achieve your financial goals, you will be happy for some time, but the effects will soon wear off as your mind adjusts to the new level of affluence. To sustain happiness you will have to set new goals for yourself, maybe in different areas of your life.

If you faithfully follow this process of making steady progress towards meaningful goals, you will become happier day by day. Please visit http://www.myhappiness.com for more information on achieving happiness.

Copyright © MyHappiness 2005-2006- All Rights Reserved.

The Pursuit of Happiness
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Sanjiv Sahay is the editor of MyHappiness–Making Life Happier http://www.myhappiness.com , a website that helps you to find your own path to sustained happiness by using Happiness Information, Directory of Resources, online tools and the help of an online community of your peers. He can be contacted at editor@myhappiness.com .

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The Pursuit of Happiness and the American Dream - It's All About Improving the Quality of Life

What did Thomas Jefferson have in mind when he penned the the phrase, "the pursuit of happiness?" Depending on your beliefs and point of view the meaning hinges on the interpretation of the word happiness. Happiness means something different to each of us, but in general most people would probably agree that happiness has a lot to do with improving the quality of life at all levels.

While there may be an over emphasis on capitalism in American society and the ever present drive for the almighty dollar, at its root this peculiar American characteristic is based on the desire to improve the quality of life. Yes, it may have become distorted over the years by the misguided notion that money will bring happiness, but we shouldn't downplay the importance of the drive to have enough money to live a comfortable life. The American dream of owning a home and having a business or a job that can offer financial stability and independence is part of our heritage. We as a people are the ones who in a very real sense have raised the bar high in establishing the ideals of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

At the very inner core of the American consciousness, beyond the material things, is the conviction and the unshakable belief in the freedom of ideas. It is the freedom of ideas, above all, that that is worth fighting and dying for, because without this liberty all other freedoms would be hollow. American ingenuity and inventiveness is based on the notion that no system and no set of beliefs is beyond questioning.

The Pursuit of Happiness and the American Dream - It's All About Improving the Quality of Life

If Einstein had not challenged the conventional beliefs and scientific precepts of his time he would not have made the remarkable contributions that he did. The drive to improve the quality of life is an inborn quality in each of us, but it is the unique American trait of casting aside false assumptions and limiting ideas that sets the standard for all to follow. We must not judge ourselves, therefore, by lesser standards and rest on our laurels, but measure ourselves against our own ideals. If we do this as a people and as a nation then the future is indeed bright.

The Pursuit of Happiness and the American Dream - It's All About Improving the Quality of Life
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Definition of Happiness - What is Happiness?

What really is the definition of happiness? Happiness is a phenomenon that is difficult to measure and thus best experienced by each individual. Therefore you may find varied definitions of happiness but really, what is happiness at least in philosophical terms?
 
Wordnet defines happiness as a state of well being characterized by emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy or put in another way, emotions experienced when in a state of well being. Our Wikipedia online tool definition of happiness is somewhat similar. Wikipedia defines it as a state of mind or feeling such as contentment, satisfaction or joy.
 
Samuel Taylor Coleridge, an English poet answers the 'what is happiness' question in a rather fractionated, segmented way, which is so true when you think about it.
 
He says "The happiness of life is made up of minute fractions. The little soon forgotten charities of a kiss or smile, a kind look, a heartfelt compliment - countless infinitesimals of pleasurable and genial feelings."
 
Those little pleasures in life certainly do add up and definitely constitute a mass of happiness in the end.
 
Arielle Essex definition of happiness is somewhat wholesome and engaging. Arielle figures happiness is a true state of mind that you can have anytime, anywhere. Happiness comes from love, wholeness and peace. It is an inner state of being that comes naturally as you become connected with who you really are, your gifts and your purpose.
 
You may choose to define happiness in psychological or religious terms other than the philosophical approach. Some of the definitions above may strike a chord with you and others won't, depending on where you are in your life right now. If in your opinion, the quality of your life in fairly absolute terms is good, then you could consider yourself a happy person.
 
There is some evidence that genes may contribute to our overall happiness but as expected other factors such as one's health, income, relationships do affect our level of happiness. Some of the factors are well beyond our control for instance, one's genetic make up, but other factors are within reason open to manipulation by us as individuals.
 
You can influence your level of happiness by simple activities like exercise which has been proven to increase one's level of well being as it may increase neurotransmitters in the brain responsible for improvement in mood. This apart from the fitness benefits you derive from exercise activities. This is just an example of how one's level of happiness can be altered by simple means.
 
In answering the question, what is happiness: you could on balance, say happiness is a state of absence of negative emotions or feelings like sadness, pain, anxiety, stress, suffering in one's life.

Definition of Happiness - What is Happiness?

Definition of Happiness - What is Happiness?
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Did you know that little steps and changes you make in your life, can result in dramatic increases in your emotional and physical well being, every morning you wake up? What could those little changes be? The answer lies here at http://www.how-to-find-happiness.org/find-happiness.htm

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The Meaning of True Love and Happiness

To love and to be loved is the beauty of life. Many people yearn for peace, love and happiness myself included. Love brings happiness that is what we are made to think from very early stages in life. Must we make others happy for us to be happy too? These are some of the dangerous myths in life that can keep you standing on your way to happiness. It is a bad life where we try to please others through out our lives. If this fails people usually become bitter, resentful and in most cases hateful to people we fail to please. If we do not resist the planted seed of co-dependence we are doomed to live for others. Happiness just like love is energy and when it is shared it brings out the best results.

Try to think of a moment when you share out a joke with a friend. The laughter brings out bursts of laughter that makes you feel so good. The exchange of this energy we call happiness is what gives a good feeling. A happy person attracts a lot of love because it is easily reflected in out every activity. This creates a strong bond between love and happiness. For instance people will always return your charming smile even though they are strangers. That is the best reflection of self-happiness. On the other hand, if you are frowning and looking ugly and angry, people will helplessly scowl at you. There is a common adage that 'life is hard, and we have to struggle to be happy.'

I tend to differ and i attribute this to our expectations of struggles and problems. It is amazing that when things are moving so swiftly for us we subconsciously wait for the storm to come. Life was meant to be easy but pessimism interferes with the natural flow of happiness in our lives. What your mind expects is what you get so everyone should be careful of his/her expectations. When the romantic relationship is going as it should, lovers panic and wait for a thunderstorm. Fear is a great thing that stands on the way of love and happiness. Fear stops you from following your heart in matters of romantic relationships. You should know that fear, love and relationship cannot coexist in the human heart.

The Meaning of True Love and Happiness

You choose to be happy and to worry less. Open your heart to happiness and you will experience a break through in love and happiness. There are times when you feel a lot of joy in your heart but i insist that the peace you feel within your own skin should not be an occasional feeling. You will have successful romantic relationships if you have a positive relationship with yourself. You and others around you will enjoy life while at the same time relaxing, being who you are without getting out of your way to impress others. There is a misconception that love and happiness is a goal to be attained in the future. Each passing day should bring a new and unique experience to you and your loved one. "We shall travel when we retire", "i will have time to take you to exotic places", "i am to busy to go for dinner" and so on should not be your phrases. Enjoy the bliss with no good reason.

The Meaning of True Love and Happiness
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Conditions of Happiness - Happy vs Unhappy - Do We Have A Choice?

Most everyone is in the process of seeking greater happiness. We are each involved in the search for feeling good inside our lives and bodies. What may come as a surprise is that many people who struggle with depression, emotional eating, stress eating, or some other addictive behavior, are really just searching for a way to feel happier. They feel some sort of unease in their emotional state and physical body, and then reach for something to numb the discomfort or make them feel better.

There is no crime in wanting to feel better. Your body is meant to be aligned with thoughts and actions that feel good. If you are currently not feeling good inside your life or your body, then certainly, continuing with emotional or stress eating, or some other addiction, is one valid choice to get through the day. If your emotional eating or addictive behavior is the only singular, lonesome tool that you have in your tool box, than hallelujah! Your self-loving survival instinct is alive and functioning. You are choosing the one action that you believe will help you feel better.

Eventually though, you will find that the fix from food or addiction does not last too long. You might feel good in the short-term, but not so well over the long-term. The consequences of your actions end up being more than you had bargained for. For example, emotional or stress eating can lead to excess weight and associated health problems. Bulimia can lead to heart arrhythmia. Anorexia can lead to impaired mental processing. The outcomes are unwanted, but the often unconscious and underlying intent was love, self-preservation, and feeling good.

Conditions of Happiness - Happy vs Unhappy - Do We Have A Choice?

If you could take all the emotional judgement, shame, and sense of failure off the eating behavior, you would be able to see that your deepest desire is an attempt to feel good. Using food, the lack of food, or some other external gratification to cope does not mean that you are sick or defective. Indeed, you are a competent manager of your own life. You might be stuck in one method of coping that has become complicated and no longer works so well, but none-the-less you are still coping and still managing life.

Take heart! New solutions for feeling better are possible. Gaining this sense of happiness does not require a deep understanding of what happened in your past, or even how dysfunctional your family was. Instead, feeling happier requires that you engage in the effort of developing new patterns of thinking and acting.

What Is Happiness

Let's take a closer look at defining happiness. Scientifically speaking, happiness is a basic sense of satisfaction with your self and your environment.

To understand this statement more fully, psychologist Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky offered this conclusion based on a 1994 study: "Happy people do not experience one success after another and unhappy people, one failure after another. Instead, surveys show that happy and unhappy people tend to have had very similar life experiences. The difference is that the average unhappy person spends more than twice as much time thinking about unpleasant events in their lives, while happy people tend to seek and rely upon information that brightens their personal outlook."

This conclusion shows that chronically happy and unhappy individuals differ in the specific thoughts and types of motivational strategies they use. For example, happy individuals interpret life events and daily situations in ways that maintain their happiness, while unhappy individuals interpret experiences in ways that reinforce unhappiness. Happy individuals are more aware of the joy and happiness available in any situation, while unhappy people register more sorrow and difficulty. This is the glass is half-empty versus the glass half-full perspective.

Wow! This is important information. The implication is that you can learn to feel happier. You can decide to take your own unhappy situation into your own hands. You can stop analyzing why you are feeling so badly, stop blaming your parents, your childhood. You can even stop blaming yourself for your troubles. Instead, you can focus on changing your thoughts and actions. Instead of focusing on the problem, you can learn to focus on the solution.

Everyone Feels Unhappy Sometimes

Recognize that everyone has experiences of feeling unhappy. Blame it on getting out of the wrong side of the bed, hormones, or the weather - it doesn't matter. One basic truth in life is that not every day is going to be an easy and miraculously happy day. Happiness expands as you make a decision to support yourself no matter what experience or emotion you are currently experiencing.

Unhappy and Happy Are Emotions

It might be useful to remind yourself that happy and unhappy are emotions. This means that like all emotions, they do not last forever. Sometimes you can shift from happy to unhappy with the passage of time. Allow more time and you will shift back into happy. In other words, this too shall pass.

Accept Being Unhappy

Acceptance is one tool your can use to deal with unhappy days. For example, since unhappy is an emotion, it means that it is a normal and natural state. You don't have to fight how you feel. Instead, decide to be at peace with the experience you are having. This doesn't mean wallowing in self-pity or drowning in depression, it means acknowledging to yourself that this the life experience you are having right now. Take several deep breathes and let it be. Once you allow acceptance, the burden of unhappy being 'wrong' disappears. A certain pressure of perfectionism disappears. A completely new way to relax and take care of yourself opens up.

Once unhappy is acceptable, you can become curious about new, self-supporting actions. For example, instead of eating to push down unhappy feelings, you can discover new ways to soothe yourself while you feel unhappy. Ask yourself,

o What actions can I take to love myself while I am feeling unhappy?

o Can I choose to be okay with this emotion?

o Can I choose to feel happy while at the same time feeling unhappy? The glass is both half-empty and half-full at the same time.

o Can I be grateful for my life even while I am currently feeling unhappy?

o What can I do right now while I am feeling unhappy to produce pleasant experiences?

Remember Happy Times

It is human nature to easily forget happy moments of our life, while terrible times easily become entrenched in our minds. Our perspective is unbalanced, and often when we are feeling sad, we can't remember ever feeling happy. In addition, we have a tendency to 'play with problem' or fixate on something negative. It seems so easy to dwell on unhappy thoughts and so difficult to train ourselves to bring optimistic thoughts and attitudes to ourselves.

The next time you are feeling unhappy, remind yourself of your larger perspective. Changing a few of your thoughts can often be the fastest way to feeling okay and not so lost. For example, you might say, "Even though I'm unhappy . . .

o My life has meaning.

o There is value in what I am feeling.

o It's okay to feel what I am feeling.

o We all have happy and unhappy moods, feelings do not last forever.

o The world is safe, and I don't have to be happy every moment.

o This too shall pass.

o I can choose to pamper myself while I am in this unhappy place.

Choose Self-Supportive Actions

When you are feeling unhappy, you know you don't need more food or addictive substances, you need to love yourself in brand new ways. This is a perfect time to focus on new opportunities to be tender to yourself. What can you do to feel better? Start thinking about what actions would make you feel just a little better. You don't have to erase your feeling of unhappiness, you just have to support yourself while you are going through it. For example:

o Go for a walk outside.

o Play with your pets.

o Walk to the nearest mirror and give yourself a much needed pep talk.

o Remind yourself that you are worthy of loving yourself even when you are unhappy.

o Support yourself with a healthy, colorful, and nourishing meal.

o Add some protein into your meals for better balance and groundedness.

o Gain a balanced perspective by writing in your journal.

o Write a gratitude list.

o Get a 20-minute chair massage.

o Sit outside and breathe in the air.

Now that you know that happiness requires action, you can begin to take care of yourself in new and different ways. Learn to see the positive in life. Your new actions won't replace your emotional or stress eating right away, and they won't immediately replace your addictive behaviors - but add enough new actions and watch as you begin to realize the power you have over your own happiness!

Conditions of Happiness - Happy vs Unhappy - Do We Have A Choice?
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Stop Thinking Like a Victim! Self-Pity is a Roadblock to Your Happiness and Self-Confidence

Casting yourself in the role of victim in your inner world and in your public persona is a straight shot to pain, disappointment and ineffectiveness. This misguided approach marginalizes your ability to live a fruitful, powerful and rewarding existence. It restricts your options, blocks your ability to make your goals and dreams come true and can weaken your confidence in yourself. Believing you are a victim and acting like one can have seriously negative effects on your relationships. Think for a moment about how people who immerse themselves in the victim role are not much fun to be around! 

Martin Seligman, the world-renowned Positive Psychologist, explains that "victimology" -- blaming our problems on other people and circumstances -- is directly related to the concept of learned helplessness. Learned helplessness is a well-documented phenomenon in which an individual does not believe that his/her actions matter in terms of how things turn out. The victim role is a form of self-pity. The Scottish philosopher Dr. Megan Reik explains, "There are few human emotions as warm, comforting and enveloping as self-pity. And nothing is more corrosive and destructive. There is only one answer; turn away from it and move on."
                                               
Are you are caught in this trap? If so, extricating yourself might just well be one of the healthiest changes you'll ever make. It is not only your right, but more importantly your responsibility, to decide if the victim role serves you or imprisons you. In my experience as a psychologist working with many clients, the victim role is a form of psychological paralysis.
 
No matter who or what has "done you wrong," it will not bring you psychological health and self-confidence to espouse the victim mentality. By definition, a victim is one who has been injured, destroyed, tricked, duped or given a raw deal; and even if you have experienced something devastating and/or patently unfair, this approach is absolutely not a viable solution.
 
Victims are often poisoned by resentment of others and self-denigration. If you have been seriously abused and cannot get past your injuries, I would recommend you seek professional help. This can be tough territory to go alone. Otherwise, get past it by looking at it from the power point. Power comes from letting these things go.
     
How do people get seduced by the victim role? I can think of some ways. There may be increased attention from others who feel sorry for the self-anointed victim. Or feeling like a victim might serve as an excuse to avoid some circumstance that evokes fear or that is regarded as distasteful. Or perhaps, ensconcing oneself in this role is a way to feel special. Whatever the reason, it leads me to believe that we bipedal primates of the species, Homo sapiens, sometimes use our high-powered brains to "snooker" ourselves!
 
The victim role is yet another example of thoughts and beliefs gone amok. Just as in the other types of destructive self-talk, identify the thoughts, beliefs and expectations that are faulty, then counter them with an empowering, non-reactive discourse. Identify instances in your thinking and imagery in which you have ordained yourself the dreaded victim. Use distraction techniques, such as thought stopping, to reduce the frequency, intensity and duration of your misguided thinking and disputing techniques to challenge these clearly counterproductive thoughts and images. Develop visual imagery and a dialogue in which you are powerful, determined, brave and successful.
 
You can find more information on this subject in my book on Positive Psychology, It's Your Little Red Wagon... Six Core Strengths for Navigating Your Path to the Good Life (Embrace the Power of Positive Psychology and Live Your Dreams).
 
Seligman, M., (2002) Authentic Happiness The Free Press. New York, New York
 
Copyright 2009. Sharon S. Esonis, Ph.D.

Stop Thinking Like a Victim! Self-Pity is a Roadblock to Your Happiness and Self-Confidence

Stop Thinking Like a Victim! Self-Pity is a Roadblock to Your Happiness and Self-Confidence
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Sharon S. Esonis, Ph.D., has spent close to three decades helping individuals thrive and improve their lives through her work as a licensed psychologist, author and life coach. An expert in human behavior and motivation, Dr. Esonis specializes in the burgeoning field of Positive Psychology, the scientific study of optimal human functioning and the core strengths that can lead to the achievement of one's personally-defined goals.

Her most recent book, "It's Your Little Red Wagon... 6 Core Strengths for Navigating Your Path to the Good Life (Embrace the Power of Positive Psychology and Live Your Dreams!)," is Dr. Esonis's contribution to the field of Positive Psychology, presenting proven success factors and strength-building techniques that can lead individuals to a life of purpose, motivation and happiness. It is available on Amazon.com.

Dr. Esonis earned her doctoral degree at Boston College and currently maintains a life coaching practice in the San Diego area. She also teaches Positive Psychology in the Extended Learning Program at California State University San Marcos. To learn more about the power of Positive Psychology and to order her latest book, visit her website at http://www.PositivePathLifeCoaching.com

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The Psychology of Happiness

A lot has been written about happiness and from psychology to philosophy, different theories of happiness have focused on issues of satisfaction, contentment, and even spiritual liberation. But happiness is one of the most subjective mental states and several factors could be at play when a person is truly happy. Whereas anger or fear could be defined with physical reactions and certain behavioural patterns, this is not so for happiness and that is how happiness is extremely subjective. For example one bar of chocolate could make one child happy whereas another child would want two chocolate bars to feel truly happy.

So why do we feel happy? Happiness is usually associated with some kind of gain or attainment. When we achieve or attain something, we feel satisfied and this triggers happiness. The attainment does not have to be material, it could very well be spiritual. It could even be bodily and physical, just as an insomniac person would feel happy after a good night's sleep. So, in defining happiness we have to locate a specific material, spiritual or physical gain or attainment and the contentment arising as a result of this attainment. The question would arise whether it is possible to be happy without any attainment. I would say that it is not possible to happy without attaining something and this attainment does not have to be immediate and could be related any past achievement. Now, you could say that you do know someone who is always happy without any specific reason. It's that you haven't found out the reason for his happiness. He may be a simple man with simple needs and happy after a warm bath or a nice meal, so that's still some attainment. So, happiness always involves some attainment or need fulfilment, however small or big that is.

Psychologists have used several models including bio psychosocial and PERMA models to explain happiness suggesting that happiness is attained when our biological, psychological and sociological needs are met or when there is pleasure (bodily for instance), engagement (in some activity for instance), relationships, meaning (for instance purpose of life) and accomplishments. These models suggest that happiness involves something deeper than just our fleeting pleasures. I would differ and suggest that happiness being extremely subjective, some people may just be happy attaining pleasures whereas some others would seek meaning or possibly accomplishments and relationships. So the level or type of attainment that makes one happy would vary from one person to another.

The Psychology of Happiness

Thus some people would be happy when their basic needs are fulfilled whereas some others would not be happy even after significant professional accomplishments as they may be expecting some other level or kind of achievement. Thus happiness largely depends on our subjective understanding of what it means to be happy. Since happiness is so subjective it cannot be strictly placed within models or frameworks although the underlying common factor that makes people happy is always some kind of attainment, gain or need fulfilment.

The next level of analysis would be whether happiness could be categorized to generalized happiness or a continued happy state of mind and specific happiness for attaining one of the specific pleasures or goals. I would suggest that there cannot be a generalized state of happiness without a specific reason. A seemingly happy person may not be genuinely happy or may be genuinely happy as he may have attained an exalted spiritual state or accumulated substantial wealth. So again as we see a continued state of happiness could also be explained with attainment.

The need fulfilment or attainment that triggers happiness could be biological such as bodily pleasures as when we quench our thirst, satisfy physical desires etc. The attainment could be social when we form relationships and feel happy or simply talk to strangers at a large event or remain engaged in social activity, or the attainment could be spiritual when we seek and even find some kind of spiritual liberation. The attainment or need fulfilment could be psychological when our love needs are fulfilled or when we reach our goals or fulfil our ambitions. The biological, psychological, social and spiritual aspects of attainment could provide happiness according to their needs. Thus happiness is intricately tied to our specific needs although these needs could be interrelated as for example the need for status or power could be both social and psychological.

Thus we distinguish the factors that could lead to happiness

1. Biological (bodily pleasures, basic needs)

2. Social (status, relationships, social activity and engagement)

3. Psychological (emotional, love, friendship, personal accomplishments)

4. Spiritual (finding meaning and purpose, transpersonal needs)

There could be several reactions to happiness and this could range from smiling to engaging in rigorous physical activity as happiness could mean a sudden surge in energy levels. People who engage in physical activity are more likely to be happy due to improved blood circulation and general good health. However happiness being an extremely subjective emotional state, in order to feel genuinely happy, some achievement in terms of long term goals such as love or conjugal life, wealth, spiritual liberation, or professional achievement could help a person to attain a continued happy state of mind. This is the prolonged state of happiness that has causes similar to any transient state of happiness although the effects could be long lasting. The people who have a prolonged state of happiness are generally lively, sporty, fun loving and optimistic. A child may show a prolonged state of happiness when adequate care and love are provided by their parents or carers. However transient states of happiness are more common as prolonged states of happiness could be interrupted by adverse life events so momentary joys and pleasures provide us with reassurance to accept and embrace life.

From a more psychoanalytic point of view, happiness would be related to desire, libido, our energy levels and even the defense mechanisms that we unconsciously use to vent out our frustration and thus remain happy or calm. Happiness would naturally raise our libidinal levels and make us more energetic and high levels of energy could in turn make us happy, so this process is cyclical. Several scientific studies have shown that happiness is directly related to our levels of energy.

Considering defense mechanisms, psychoanalysis could in a way suggest that happiness is actually acting out or reaction formation when we show certain reactions that may be completely opposite to what we feel. For example in reaction formation we may show happiness, when in reality we are sad or depressed. Although genuine happiness could be explained with psychoanalysis as well, as for example, an artist is genuinely happy when he can sublimate his desires to socially acceptable forms of expression through his creativity. A sportsman is genuinely happy when he can channel his aggressive or sexual desires through sport or rigorous activity. So these defense mechanisms in psychoanalysis could actually produce genuine happiness in people because of the inherent survival and coping strategies involved in these defenses.

Finally, happiness being a state of mind would be entirely subjective and would evoke extreme subjective reactions. For instance, someone laughs on hearing a joke and feel happy about it and someone else would be sarcastic or may not feel the same level of excitement. Whereas anger and other emotions could be explained in terms of physical responses, happiness usually does not have defined physical responses although there is a general positive feeling of well being and the physical responses could vary considerably. As I have stated on the psychology of emotions, it would be necessary to determine the components of feeling and bodily reaction for every emotion including happiness and psychology has an extensive research project to consider for the future.

The Psychology of Happiness
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Reflections in Psychology - Part I - by Saberi Roy (2009)
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Reflections in Psychology - Part II - by Saberi Roy (2011)
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How to Recover After a Breakup and Find Happiness Once More

Your relationship ended and now you're trying to figure out how to recover after a breakup. It's difficult trying to get over someone you love and move on with your life. Hopefully these tips can help you recover and realize that there's happiness even after a breakup.

Face your grief completely

No one wants to go through a breakup and face those feelings of depression, anger, and sadness. Such feelings can be so intense that you feel like it's literally ripping your heart in two. Sad to say, if you really want to recover from the heartache, then this is the way to do it.

How to Recover After a Breakup and Find Happiness Once More

What you need to remember is that these feelings won't last forever no matter how strong or intense they are. Once you are able to work through them, you will be in a better emotional state.

Don't be afraid of being single

Also, you shouldn't be afraid to grieve for the future that you lost. Sure, you may have had thoughts of spending your life with your ex but now those dreams turned to dust. You can still have a good future whether it's with someone else or by yourself.

That's right, you shouldn't be afraid to be single. Being single doesn't mean you're pathetic and you're all alone. After all, if you're not happy being single then you can never be happy in a relationship. Why? Because it means that you're not content with who you are. It could also mean that your happiness depends on whether you're in a relationship or not. You don't want to be one of those people who can't be happy without a boyfriend/girlfriend, do you?

What happened in the relationship?

Several things can cause the breakup:

· You and your ex were just not compatible

· You spend more and more time arguing and it's becoming stressful staying in the relationship

· You took each other for granted

· Someone cheated

· You had a wake-up call and you felt like it's time to move on from each other

These are just some of the examples. It's important to find out what happened and what caused the breakup so that you can avoid doing the same mistakes in your next relationship. It's also helpful when it comes to sticking to your decisions. There will come a time when you just want to give in and get back together with your ex. But this is something you want to avoid doing if you ever want to recover from the breakup.

You need to realize that sometimes, things just don't work out and the best solution is to move on from each other. You can't just stay in a relationship because you've been in it for years and you're afraid of starting over. You also need to think about yourself and be honest when it comes to figuring out if the relationship is worth keeping.

How to recover after a breakup and find happiness once more? It would be very difficult at first so you need to take your time. Remember not to cave in and beg your ex to come back to you. You need to stay strong if you ever want to move on.

How to Recover After a Breakup and Find Happiness Once More
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7 Reasons to Do Community Service - How Community Service Can Help Your Success and Happiness

We all know that doing community service is a 'good' thing to do, but do you know why? And it's not just that you're helping the underprivileged or the environment - there are some real tangible benefits from helping others. This article discusses 7 of them.

1. Karma
"What goes around, comes around", "The Boomerang effect", "Karma" - what ever you want to call it, there is mounting evidence that when you do good things, good things happen to you. The Law of Attraction explains it as attracting good by doing good, and by maintaining the flow of good positive energy.

But more logically, if you are doing good things for your community, then you're focusing on positive attributes of yourself and others and this has real spin-offs in the form of a positive outlook on the rest of your life.

7 Reasons to Do Community Service - How Community Service Can Help Your Success and Happiness

2. Perspective and Passion
I've learnt from personal experience, when you're helping a young family pull together their lives after losing everything in a cyclone - you begin to understand what really matters. Community service of all kinds gives you this grounding perspective.

But from that grounding perspective comes passion. Passion to help others in the same situation and passion to protect your family and community from the same thing. And passion is such a wonderful and motivating force - you can achieve anything with passion!

3. Networking
Volunteer organizations attract people from a wide range of backgrounds and professions - students, unemployed, retirees, trades people, professionals and business executives - so volunteer organizations give you a fantastic opportunity to network!

And you never know what opportunities you'll encounter with this new network of contacts. We managed to renovate our house for half the cost through the contacts we've met in our community work! Not to mention, that's where I met my lovely partner!

4. Understanding People
Inevitably, community work involves working with other people - whether it's other community workers or the people you're helping. So the ability to communicate and understand these people is paramount for your own sanity, and of course your effectiveness.

And because the people in volunteer organizations come from a diverse background, you get to develop communication skills with a wide range of personalities. You can't pay for emotional intelligence training like this!

5. Learn New Skills
As community work actually involves doing something, you will gain skills in the particular 'something' of the organization you've joined. Whether it's tree planting, first aid and rescue skills, counseling, organizing, planning or even blanket knitting - you WILL learn something new.

And some skills such as first aid and planning and organizational skills you'll find helpful in other aspects of your life too!

6. Contribution to the greater good
Don't forget the big warm and fuzzy feeling you get when you know you've made a contribution - whether it's the environment or humanitarian causes, it all contributes to the greater good.

7. Your legacy
How do you want to be remembered? What do you want to see written on your tombstone or in your obituary?

We all want to be remembered as something special - a loving partner and parent, a successful career, a passion. But a community minded spirit is the BEST legacy.

So how can YOU help?

Well you can start by telling people about how you or someone you know contribute to the community or environment - even if this contribution seems small - and inspire others to do the same. Or read about what other people are doing and give them a boost by posting a supportive comment. Just check out http://www.achieve-goal-setting-success.com/community-contribution.html to share your story or post a comment about someone else's experience.

And of course, you can get more involved with your community or an environmental cause - you'll marvel at the difference just one person, YOU, can make. Here are some ideas to get started...

7 Reasons to Do Community Service - How Community Service Can Help Your Success and Happiness
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Serotonin - The Nutritional Way Of Increasing Happiness And Reducing Food Craving

Have you ever noticed how much easier it is to lose weight or eat the foods that suit you, when you are happy? Along with maintaining your happiness through a positive mental attitude, you can actually stimulate it through the food you eat. Yes, that's right you can really eat to be happy!

It is all down to the foods you eat and their effect on the chemical reactions in your brain. Serotonin is a brain chemical, a type of messenger, that operates between nerve cells. It is aided in its use in the brain by vital fats from fish oils, cold-pressed flax and walnut oil. As a natural anti-depressant it can also reduces craving and comfort eating.

So where does this serotonin come from? Well, we make it in our body from an amino acid called tryptophan. Just think of the foods that give you a fast 'quick fix' high. The foods that offer this limited 'quick fix' serotonin effect include sweets, confectionary, crisps, white bread, white rice, alcohol and other processed foods.

Serotonin - The Nutritional Way Of Increasing Happiness And Reducing Food Craving

These particular amino acid rich foods have a quick release but short-term effect on the body. All, however, perpetuate your cravings when the initial serotonin 'high' dissipates. That makes them foods that increase your cravings as the tryptophan levels suddenly decrease. This is one reason why, when your brain is lacking in serotonin, you reach out for these tryptophan 'quick fix' foods as a comforter. There is no doubt that they do give you the desired boost of serotonin but it is temporary and therefore you are more likely to eat inappropriately.

By eating foods that steadily release tryptophan, the ones that don't give you a quick serotonin fix, you can naturally boost your long-term levels of serotonin. This in turn reduces your food cravings and raises your happiness levels. How great is that!

Maintaining correct levels of tryptophan is critical in balancing your moods and behaviour. It heals the unhappiness or depression that leads you back into inappropriate eating habits. In addition these 'slow release' tryptophan foods give you a long-term sense of well being. If levels in your body are normal, you won't crave or feel the need to overeat sugary and refined carbohydrate foods. Steady, long-term releasing tryptophan is found mainly in...

Turkey;

Chicken;

Fish;

Pheasant;

Partridge;

Cottage cheese;

Bananas;

Eggs;

Nuts;

Wheat germ;

Avocados;

Milk;

Cheese;

Legumes (peas, beans, pulses, soya);

In smaller amounts in potatoes, wholegrain breads, cereals, and brown rice. Eating a balanced diet that includes some of these foods can help raise your happiness motivators. With other amino acids competing with tryptophan to be absorbed into the body, it is helpful to raise insulin levels moderately. This can be achieved by eating small amounts of starchy foods such as brown rice, wholemeal bread, porridge oats and jacket potatoes, alongside protein foods. Sunlight is also essential for the development of serotonin in our bodies.

As a messenger in the brain, serotonin also needs healthy receptors in order for messages to be transmitted effectively. These chemical receptors are built principally from vital fats found mainly in oily fish (such as mackerel, salmon, tuna, herrings and sardine), fish oil supplements, cold-pressed flax and walnut oil.

Depression and negative moods can be significantly improved by daily introductions of these fats, along with slow releasing tryptophan rich foods, over a three to four month period. How's that for a great solution to healing your cravings and overeating. Eat your way to happiness and the weight you were born to be!

© Chrissie Webber 2008

Serotonin - The Nutritional Way Of Increasing Happiness And Reducing Food Craving
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Chrissie Webber is a published author, business coach and leadership trainer. As Managing Director of Life-Shapers Ltd she is developing her online weight-loss motivation company http://www.lifeshapers.co.uk into a franchise of Life Shapers Weight Management Coaches.

Her track record in the area of weight management is firstly a personal one. Following a lifetime of weight issues - at her heaviest, over 21 stone and a massive size 30 - she has personal experience of diets and their devastating effect on size and psyche.

With a background in nursing, psychology and business coaching, coupled with a lifetime of dieting, she developed and successfully used a series of models and tools that enhance weight loss motivation. Now over 5 dress sizes smaller and having sustained her weight loss for several years she has written a book about her motivational journey. Weight Loss, Life Gain - A Motivational Journey to Permanent Weight Loss was published in January 2008 by Accent Press.

Her Blog [http://www.chrissiewebber.co.uk] and free monthly eZine now offer support to others.

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